🌟 My biggest secret & embracing your past

Hey Flawsome Human 😎

Happy hump day. Hope this week is treating you well - how is it already halfway through August?

This weeks edition is very near and dear to my heart.

It’s the launch day of my podcast You’re Not a Bad Person.

You’re here because you probably follow me on LinkedIn, or stumbled across a post of mine in the internet somewhere.

My whole brand is around being authentic. And the ironic part is - I wasn’t being completely authentic myself.

Yes, to an extent I was. I’m an open book and share all of my struggles openly, but there’s a big piece of the puzzle that’s been left out of the picture.

I hid this part of my life for nearly 10 years because:

A) I thought it would discredit my success/everything I’ve worked so hard to build, and

B) People wouldn’t love & accept me anymore.

But it’s a part of my past.

I was a sex worker for 7 years before pursuing entrepreneurship.

Before understanding and knowing how to love myself.

Before realizing external things can’t fill voids.

The full story is now out on my podcast, and I hope you’ll tune into it with an open mind.

Listen on Apple

Listen on Spotify

Which leads me to todays topic…

💪How to embrace your past 💪

Think of one thing you’ve done in your past (it can be anything) that you feel shame or guilt around. Got it? Let’s work through it together:

1️⃣ Change the meaning: Someone I admire named Ed Mylett says, “It’s not the events of our lives that define us, it’s the meaning we take away from those events.” Aka you control the narrative. If you’ve done something in your past you aren’t necessarily proud of, change the meaning of that event and how you think about it.

For me, I had to come from a place of compassion for the younger version of myself who was looking for love in all the wrong places. She was hurting. And instead of holding shame around it, I’m empowered by it.

2️⃣ Have conversations: When we hide and suppress things, we can’t process them. Our subconscious is really good at protecting us, but it can also be detrimental. Those unwanted emotions manifest & prevent us from reaching our highest potential.

Pick someone in your life that you trust to talk to. Tell them what you’re struggling with, or just share something you’ve never talked about before.

They will likely reciprocate & get vulnerable with you as well, and you’re showing them that you trust them. You’ll get even closer, and you’ll feel lighter just by talking about that ‘thing’ you’ve been carrying around forever.

Plus, you’ll realize that thing you’ve been so afraid of facing, isn’t so bad.

3️⃣ OWN IT: Own your story - all of it. Don’t apologize for the versions of you that you’re not ‘proud’ of. If you live an authentic life (I mean, REALLY authentic), you’re going to draw in the right people, and the right opportunities. And if you take it one step further & share your story with the world, you can inspire thousands of people to love & accept themselves, too.

At the end of the day, we all just want to be love and accepted.

We all want to feel seen.

It’s hard to feel seen when people hide who they really are. It makes you feel like you’re the only one, which isn’t true at all.

I’m typing this at a coffee shop with tears in my eyes & a wave of nausea while ‘Turn Back Time’ by Cher plays over the radio.

I understand I’m probably going to lose some people after this newsletter goes out.

But what’s more important to me is showing up as myself in this world & serving the people who need to hear my story.

Not the filtered, watered down version.

& the world deserves that version of you, too.

Stay Flawsome,

-Erica

P.S. if you did listen, and it gave you some insights or perspective, please reply and let me know. 🙂